Arsema Thomas Talks 'She Taught Love' Film & The Beauty of Vulnerability
Photo courtesy of Andscape/Hulu
Arsema Thomas is a dedicated actor. After discovering our mutual love for reading and that Thomas read a lot of books for their breakout role as young Lady Agatha Danbury in the Bridgerton prequel series, Queen Charlotte, I just had to know the preparation process for their latest role.
She Taught Love from Andscape—the premiere Black-led content studio of Disney-ESPN—premieres on Hulu today (Sept. 27) and stars Thomas alongside Darrell Britt-Gibson in a bittersweet romance story. It follows the twists and turns of Frank Cooper (Britt-Gibson) and Mali Waters (Thomas) following their "meet-cute" moment that transforms into a love that tests their patience and the realities of mortality.
The cast also includes Taissa Farmiga, Alexander Hodge, D’Arcy Carden and Edwin Lee Gibson. Nate Edwards makes his feature directorial debut and Britt-Gibson (who penned the original screenplay) makes his writing debut.
"So I read Love by Toni Morrison, which I think is one of her understated books. Then I read A Love Song For Ricky Wilde," Thomas shares over Zoom when I asked about the books she read for the role of Mali. Funnily enough, I added A Love Song For Ricky Wilde to my Kindle account just a few days prior.
Thomas' voice lights up at the news: "Let me tell you, you have to read this book. It's all the feels, and I love it when the words evoke emotion in you without you having to engage with it in all five senses. It means that it's that much more potent. I highly recommend it. I'm not going to give you any spoilers, but you will be shocked. And then I read Salvation by bell hooks. Those three books were the tenants of who Mali was. Salvation speaks to the revolutionary aspect of love. Ricky Wilde speaks to the emotional vulnerability. There's something about reading about somebody falling in love that helps you get into that mindset of being able to do that as well. And then Love by Toni Morrison. I love Toni, and it creates this alternate reality where love can exist. I wanted to embody this character and what she was going through in all of the potential ways."
Below, Thomas speaks to EDITION about the connections between themselves and their character Mali, and their biggest takeaways from the film.
What I appreciated about the film is its beautiful balance. There are some traumatic aspects, but there's also such playfulness between Mali and Frank. Of course, there's the love that's holding the plot line together, but there's heartache and this emotional tug-of-war. It's not a typical love story, right? But that's what I appreciate about it—it's just so real.
That's the best compliment, honestly. There's a relatability in it, because I think that was such a massive priority for Daryl, who wrote it, and for myself, when embodying this character, that she doesn't feel like a caricature. You see these natural moments of friction, these different obstacles that just come with being alive. That was the best part about embodying it. The best part of working on it was that you got the moments of laughter and deep emotion. You get family, you get friends, you get romantic love, all the different forms of love you see portrayed in the film. And I think that's also something that tends to be overlooked. We think it's just romantic love, one between your partner and yourself, but really there's a whole world of love that you can be open and available to. That nuance also made it so easy to do my job because all I had to do was just live and forget that the camera was there. Because so much of his words felt already lived in. They felt so real. They felt like natural reactions that you would have. It’s a massive blessing and generous gift to be given a script that is doing half your job for you, honestly.
I mean, it could have easily been a sob story about focusing explicitly on the cancer portion and people pitying Mali. But I love that it didn't become such a tragedy.
I agree it's important. Also, because so many times, specifically with films that center us, we feel as though we're not sometimes deserving of happiness. Our story's not taken seriously when there's just us being happy humans. That was also the part that I was really excited about engaging with. This has a happy ending. How often do you get to see that?
While I was watching the film, I wrote in my notes, “This is pure black love without struggle.” I'm so glad you touched on that.
That's true. That was the reason why I was so excited to do it. I was like, “This feels like something revolutionary.” This has never been done before, and I'm hoping that people will see this and recognize that they are deserving of it as well.
I want to speak more about your work with Darrell because this is also his writing debut. What was that dynamic like working with him? Were you able to make notes on the script, or did you just take his words and run with them?
Oh, no, I made a lot. That's what made it an easy working relationship. I think on our first call, I was like, “I have notes”. And he was so receptive because I think he understood that he wanted to showcase Black and chocolate women in the forefront of something. And so he was generous in allowing me to make sure that Mali remained this three-dimensional person, and the moment that I recognized it was a safe space to air my opinions, then [I knew] I fully can trust this person because I know that we have the same endpoint in mind. If we agree on that, then everything else is superfluous. It became this really beautiful friendship where we were able to joke with one another, be serious with one another, and cry with one another. And it was a relationship that was devoid of judgment, but knowing that we just want to tell this story so bad. I wanted to do him a service as well. He's been with this story for seven years and he fought really, really hard to make sure that it looks the way that it did. I just wanted to support that because it benefits all of us at the end of the day.
Photo courtesy of Andscape/Hulu
The overall feeling of the film is quite happy. But of course, your character Mali has cancer. Were there certain exercises or ways that you got yourself out of that traumatic headspace?
Again, a testament to Darrell. He would drive me to and from set. At the end of every day, we would sit in his car and decompress for two hours, just going through everything of the day and creating this sense of distance between Frank and Mali and me and him. I shaved my head for the role. There were points where I was like, “I'm fine”. Having somebody who was watching every scene tell me that it’s okay to leave it back there, it gave me permission to return to myself.
Because there are moments where you feel, “I have to take this person home because I'm going to be them again tomorrow.” So what's the point of having five hours of grace? And sometimes you just need somebody to tell you it is okay to unclench your fist. It is okay to just relax, even for a moment. So, yeah, it's truly a testament to him because I think it could have been dark. But that's what the beauty of a support system is for. That's the beauty of community. And that's a beauty, truly, of what love is. It’s being that outstretched arm to guide somebody through obstacles and challenges.
Speaking of challenges, your character is so headstrong and doesn’t often want to let her emotional guard down as much. I was reading some of your previous interviews, and—of course, I'm speaking to you for the first time—but you also seem very headstrong. Did you relate to Mali in that way?
You know, I thought that we were light-years different. I don't consider myself headstrong. I think when you're in it, it's hard to look at yourself from the outside. So I also saw her as this extremely confident, driven woman who knows what she wants. I was like, “This is going to be that challenge of a lifetime because I don't know what I want.” I go by the flow. I'm much more lackadaisical than her. Lady Danbury was very much a call to my mother and my grandmother, but Mali reminded me of one of my best friends, who always has this space for other people. She's always carrying everybody on her shoulders. She knows what she wants. She's extremely driven. And it's funny because then when she walks the trailer, she's like, “This is you!” And I think that was the gift of the script and of the whole experience. I was able to actually see myself from outside of my own flawed perspective because I think we're all very insecure, and we're our harshest critics. For a moment, I was able to take those blinders down and say, “I'm actually further along than I thought I was.”
Was there anything else that you've learned or anything that you've taken away from playing Mali?
I honestly learned what true vulnerability means. She goes through a lot of really scary things, and you never realize she doesn't ask for help until the one moment she does, when she's in the kitchen, right before they're about to go and see her parents. And I could feel my own physical response as we were doing that scene of actual fear. I realized I don't usually ask for help. I'll just hunker down and hope that I get through it. I don't know if it's something that we as women all just go through feeling like we are supposed to carry the burden, but it was in that moment that I realized I actually could and should lean up on the people that love me because that's what they want for me. You don't want to see the people you love suffer or struggle with anything, especially if you can help them. That was the beauty of having Mali in my life. I can now have this space to call upon my friends and my loved ones to be the champions in my absence.
I’m glad you mentioned that because I didn't think about it in that way. Mali is the embodiment of Black women. We're the matriarchs. We hold the family together. We pour so much into other people without pouring into ourselves. The more we talk about her, the more I realize she really represents our silent struggle.
Exactly, we grin and bear it.
I also like this aspect of the film. It shows that there are different sides to us besides being strong women all the time.
Yeah, exactly. We are also goofy. We enjoy fun. I think breaking out of this idea of Black as a monolith is what a lot of the film is about. I'm just hoping that people, regardless of their race, will see themselves in Mali, because there is something universal in her.
I think the film's overarching theme is living in the moment and not worrying so much about what you can control in the future.
Yeah. From the meet-cute moment of her just being like, “I'll just take a chance”. I think there's so much that the universe puts on our platter that all we have to do is just pick it up and realize that we don't have to force so much. I'm big on spirituality. The path will lay itself out. It's only me who can fuck it up. There's so many moments of that where she's like, “I'll give this guy the time of day. I'll have the fun that I have”.
It only happens when longevity starts to be jeopardized. When we are not rushing, when we have all the time in the world, those are the moments when we really should be taking every opportunity that life gives us. And I think that's the thing Frank and his character represent, that YOLO mentality. He just flies by the seat of his pants. And that, to her, is what liberation looks like. And that's the generous gift that he gives Mali. I mean, it's a privilege to be able to be spontaneous, to be able to just say yes whenever we want. Showcasing that as an option for us as Black people, for us as marginalized people, is what I hope people will be able to take into their lives once they watch the film. Just say yes. It reminds me of Shonda Rhimes’ book, The Year of Yes. Everyone should reread this book. Everyone should rewatch this movie.
